Despite having served for years as a distinguished Pakistani diplomat, Akbar Zeb reportedly cannot receive accreditation as Pakistan's ambassador to Saudi Arabia. The reason, apparently, has nothing to do with his credentials, and everything to do with his name -- which, in Arabic, translates to "biggest dick":

In Saudi Arabia, size does count.

A high level Pakistani diplomat has been rejected as Ambassador of Saudi Arabia because his name, Akbar Zib, equates to "Biggest Dick" in Arabic. Saudi officials, apparently overwhelmed by the idea of the name, put their foot down and gave the idea of his being posted there, the kibosh.

According to this Arabic-language article in the Arab Times, Pakistan had previously floated Zeb's name as ambassador to the United Arab Emirates and Bahrain, only to have him rejected for the same reason. One can only assume that submitting Zeb's name to a number of Arabic-speaking countries is some unique form of punishment designed by the Pakistani Foreign Ministry -- or the result of a particularly egregious cockup.

Few foresee a fantastic future for AEROSMITH, whose recent break-up scare has disintegrated into pure turmoil. Steven Tyler is in rehab after finally admitting to being addicted to painkillers, and the rest of the band are reported to be auditioning new singers. That, of course, has Tyler's management in legal tizzy. Tyler himself is just in a regular tizzy — he was spotted in a Southern California Home Depot, where he hijacked the PA system, inhaled some helium, and sang some high-pitched karaoke. This would be an amusing antic if he were 40 years younger and not famous.

Meanwhile, there's been a lot of buzz about the search for a replacement singer. Paul Rodgers and Lenny Kravitz have been mentioned, but most delightful among the rumors is that Billy Idol — Billy Idol! — is a contender. Recent reports indicate that Billy caught a cold and missed his meeting with Joe Perry, but here's hoping he gets another shot. I'd be tickled to hear him singing Aerosmith songs — or, better, Aerosmith backing Billy Idol songs.

Actually, Aerosmith should hire him, adopt an all-Billy set list, and change the band's name to "Billy Idol."

Tony Blair has a consultancy, charities and a multimillion-pound book deal. Photograph: Martin Argles

The former prime minister Tony Blair has received millions of pounds through an unusual mixture of commercial, charitable and religious income streams. Since he stepped down from office in 2007, his financial affairs have been described by observers as "Byzantine" and "opaque". The Guardian is now launching an online competition offering a prize to the person who can shine the brightest light on those financial structures.

Blair has a commercial consultancy, called Tony Blair Associates, plus jobs advising a US bank and a Swiss insurer. He has a multimillion pound book deal. He also has a charity, the Tony Blair Africa Governance Initiative, and another called the Tony Blair Faith Foundation. But much of the income, which includes charitable donations from other sources, has been funnelled through a structure called Windrush Ventures No 3 Limited Partnership. Our contest asks: what is Windrush?

It's exciting to watch. Pixar are now firmly into Phase Three, their Rubber Soul period. It's much like the Second Miles Davis Quintet, which spanned the middle to late 1960's. The period when Miles, the great American artist, kept pushing himself, driving his art into new and uncharted territory, desperate to outrun the competition, desperate to outrun his own famed reputation. And he was backed by the best band in the world, save one (The Beatles). The resulting albums evolved rapidly from the hard bop of ESP, to the abstract rock of Filles de Killemjaro, and finally to the great paradigm shift, the great break - fusion.

So where is Pixar driving towards? What is our end goal? I always point to the Japanese masters, Isao Takahata and Hayao Miyazaki, but these are our teachers. The new paradigm will be something different, something new. I would die happy if Pixar could create something as sublime and masterful as Gauche the Cellist, My Neighbor Totoro, Whisper of the Heart, Omohide Poro Poro. But when Pixar finally breaks the barriers imposed upon American animation, the new paradigm will prove a surprise. It will be different. How? In what way? I can't say. They must be willing to push themselves further than ever before, and push the audiences further than ever before.

It is altogether possible, and very likely if history is any judge, that Pixar's masterpieces will be ahead of their time. The parents will be completely lost, and maybe some of the kids, too. But some will get it. They will become the artists of the next generation, the new trailblazers of the year 2028. For evidence, closely examine the following: Pet Sounds; The Ramones; Citizen Kane; Horus, Prince of the Sun.

Perfect.